How to Be a Better Human In Five Steps ~ lifeoframen

I admittedly have some procrastination problems. Some problems worse than others, like cleaning my room, taking out the trash, or calling my mother. But I am only human, like most of you out there. (Extraterrestrials welcome) Wouldn't you like to make your self a better you? Someone who always takes out the trash, who has a twenty pack, someone the ladies smile at. Well I have a few tips for you! They are fairly simple, but I see that far to many people ignore them.

Keep in mind that some of these are fairly offensive, so keep your shorts on and try to take notes!

Drink water, not carbonated sugary shit. I know they are delicious, and some people use them to raise their blood sugar, but come on. They make you fat, they make your teeth weird colors, and if you ever want a shot with a super fit person, it wont happen if you are drinking Coke in front of them.
Brush your teeth on a regular basis! Ask anybody, they all have a stigma against rotting nasty teeth. Plus, when you go in for the kiss, you want to have them coming back for more. Not running to the nearest trash can to vomit.
This one is fairly important if you want to continue having sex with a person after the first time. Take care of your private areas! That means shaving regularly, and especially keeping it smelling as far away from dirty asshole as possible. Girls, I know its uncomfortable to wash it out everyday but there are super cheap over the counter tablets that keep it smelling amazing!
This is a little less personal, but one of the most important! Get some sort of planner, whether its a schedule book, or an Iphone. If you forget an appointment you have the potential to lose friends, lose work opportunities and lose a date. Keep everything that is time sensitive in it, keep phone numbers in it, business cards. Read it very often! Be an adult people can depend on. If you say you are taking a girl to dinner, you better be five minutes early, ready to open the car door for her. Or better yet, if you tell your children (if applicable) that you will take them to the zoo, you better take them to the zoo. Or else they will remember the day you forgot for the rest of their teenage lives.
Regrettably, this is the last tip. Possibly the most important also. You need to learn to balance your life. This is such a difficult thing to do for some people, including myself. You need to find friends to hang out with a couple times a week. Then you need to spend time working on something that needs to get done. Then you need to find a significant other and somehow try not to mix all those lives together. Most likely your girlfriend wont want to play beer pong 5 times a week, so find something that you both like to do, and do it. After a little practice, you will see that you become less stressed and the relationships around you grow stronger. And on a last note, if you are currently socially crippled then you NEED to work on that. Whether it be with a girl, or your friends or work, you need to show them a smile and you need to be interesting to them. Show them that they can depend on you, or that you are a nice guy. This isn't high school, not all girls like the bad boys, they like the cute funny ones now. Get some business cards, even if you are not in a business. It is sexier than having to get a pen out and writing your name and number on a napkin.

Sadly, that is all I have for you. If you have any questions or comments, feel free and I encourage you to comment.

So have a wonderful day everyone, and stay nerdy!